Sermon for Sunday Aug. 10th, 2003

Is Gay Okay? by Joel Smith

Romans 1:25-28

Today’s Message: "Is Gay Okay?"
Wellspring Community Church 9-2-01


Is gay okay? The subject was quite academic to me until about a year ago. I could piously and smugly give you my opinion and several verses to back it all up. It was easy to talk about then because homosexuality, for me, had no face to it.

That changed one day at the end of last summer. An old high school friend of mine, who I hadn’t really hung out with in a number of years dropped by the house. We used to be pretty good friends. We’d gone camping and on trips to the beach together. We both enjoyed weekend ventures to midnight movies whenever we could find them. He was an usher in my wedding. He was just a good old boy in my mind.

The day he dropped by he began asking me a question about the Bible. That’s not unusual. But he was really interested in the story of the Ethiopian eunuch found in chapter eight of the book of Acts. I shared my thoughts about the story and what I thought was it’s point. Then he shared his. He said he thought the theme was that God didn’t make junk. He asked me if I thought God ever made junk and I, of course, said "No." It was then he confessed, "Joel, I’m gay."

Thus began my journey from detached observer to honest struggler with this issue. My friend and I have had numerous long telephone conversations over homosexuality. He contends that you can be a Christian and gay at the same time. I disagree. So far neither one of us have been able to change the mind of the other. We’re still friends, but our relationship is different now.

As I think about the issue of homosexuality it is his face that I see. I also see the incredibly warm, caring and loving faces of the gay men and women he attends church with, including the pastor. It is those living, breathing human beings created in the image of God who I keep in mind today, not some stereotype drag queen in a gay pride parade. Homosexuality has a face for me so I approach the subject with gentleness and respect, but also with the truth.

At the heart of this issue is not whether you think gay is okay or whether I do. The question that must be answered is …

What Does God Think About Homosexuality?

Please understand that here I am separating the person from the practice. God’s word is unambiguous toward the homosexual lifestyle. Let’s first note a theme that is present from beginning to end.

The Bible consistently affirms monogamous, heterosexual marriage.

We’ll look at prohibitions against the gay lifestyle in a moment. I thought we needed to start with the thing that we know God honors, monogamous, heterosexual marriage. The first book of the Bible reveals this affirmation.


So God created people in his own image; God patterned them after himself; male and female he made them. God blessed them and told them, "Multiply and fill the earth and subdue it. Be masters over the fish and birds and all the animals." Genesis 1:27-28 (NLT)

God created humanity as male and female with the express purpose to reproduce and fill the earth. It is the first command given to humanity. In the command God blessed the male/female bond.

Chapter two of Genesis focuses in and give us a closer look at the creation of humanity. Originally God created the first human being, Adam, but noticed something was wrong.

And the LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a companion who will help him." Genesis 2:18 (NLT)

As the story goes, God made all the different species of animals file past the man, but none of them was a suitable companion for him. To alleviate his loneliness God fashioned a woman from a rib in Adam’s side. She must have been a real looker. Listen to Adam’s words:

"At last!" Adam exclaimed. "She is part of my own flesh and bone! She will be called ’woman,’ because she was taken out of a man." This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one. Genesis 2:23-24

Here we have marriage between a man and a woman. Older translations say that husband and wife are to be joined into a "one flesh" relationship. Sexual expression symbolizes the unity that husband and wife are to maintain. A monogamous, heterosexual marriage is the only place sex is supposed to happen according to God’s design. This theme runs throughout the Bible. Even into the New Testament. Jesus repeated Genesis 2:24, reaffirming the sacredness of marriage between man and woman. You cannot get past this fact when discussing homosexuality from a Christian perspective.

New Testament Affirmations: Matthew 19:5-6; Mark 10:7-8; Ephesians 5:31

On the flipside …

The Bible consistently denounces homosexual activity.

See Genesis 19:1-8; Judges 19:16-30; Leviticus 18:22, 20:13; 1 Corinthians 6:9-10; 1 Timothy 1:10; 2 Peter 2:6-7; Jude 7

Homosexuality is in the same category as premarital and extramarital sex. It is all adultery. What does it mean when something is adulterated? It means it’s lost its purity. Something has been added that should not be there. Any sexual expression outside the confines of a monogamous, heterosexual marriage is an adulteration of God’s original design. The book of Romans makes this exceedingly clear.

Instead of believing what they knew was the truth about God, they deliberately chose to believe lies. So they worshiped the things God made but not the Creator himself … That is why God abandoned them to their shameful desires. Even the women turned against the natural way to have sex and instead indulged in sex with each other. And the men, instead of having normal sexual relationships with women, burned with lust for each other. Men did shameful things with other men and, as a result, suffered within themselves the penalty they so richly deserved. Romans 1:25-28 (NLT)

These verses alone make it clear that homosexual behavior is out of bounds. It is not part of God’s plan and it outright denies what he’s clearly sanctioned and blessed, husband and wife in a committed marriage.

Perhaps the clear affirmations and denunciations from the Bible are enough for you. Are there other reasons God would call the gay experience off limits? Yes, there are many. Keep in mind that God gives us boundaries for our own protection. I think you’ll see the reasons for his loving limits in the following statistics.

The High Price Of Gay Love

As I mentioned a couple of Sundays ago, God understands the consequences of delving outside his boundaries. We pay a high price when we do.

Run away from sexual sin! No other sins so clearly affects the body as this one does. For sexual immorality is a sin against your own body. 1 Corinthians 6:18 (NLT)

I am indebted to author Thomas E. Schmidt and his book Straight & Narrow? Compassion and Clarity in the Homosexuality Debate. He includes an entire chapter on the physical, mental and emotional price that homosexual’s pay for their activities. I’m only scratching the surface today, because there are so many pitfalls to the gay lifestyle. Plus, we can’t discuss the graphic details of physical problems related to the methods of gay sex. What I have to present should be convincing by itself.

· Long-term relationships are virtually nonexistent.

Patterns of sexual practice among homosexuals (Bell and Weinberg)

1. Frequency of sex outside of long term relationship
74% of males homosexuals had more than 100 partners in a lifetime
41% of males homosexuals had more than 500 partners in a lifetime
28% of males homosexuals had more than 1000 partners in a lifetime

Only 8% of homosexual men and 7% of women ever had a relationship that lasted more than 3 years. A Los Angeles study in the late 1980’s noted that the average male homosexual had 20 partners per year.

"Tragically, lifelong faithfulness is almost nonexistent in the homosexual experience."

Thomas E. Schmidt, Straight & Narrow? Compassion and Clarity in the Homosexual Debate, 106-107.

· Higher occurrences of substance abuse

1989 San Francisco study revealed:
89% had used marijuana (25% of heterosexual population)
50% had used cocaine (6% of heterosexual population)
72% had used poppers, a sexual enhancement drug (2% of heterosexual population)
50% had used LSD (3% of heterosexual population)

"A national study of 1,924 female homosexuals conducted in 1984 found that 83 percent regularly used alcohol (25 percent more than once a week, 6percent every day), 47 percent smoked marijuana, and 30 percent regularly smoked tobacco."

Thomas E. Schmidt, Straight & Narrow? Compassion and Clarity in the Homosexual Debate, 110-111

· Greater instances of mental illness

30% of homosexuals are problem drinkers as opposed to 10% of heterosexuals

Rates of depression: 40% male homosexuals, 3% male heterosexuals
37% female homosexuals, rates of female heterosexuals is similar

Rates of suicide (considered):
35% male homosexuals, 11% male heterosexuals
31% female homosexuals, 24% female heterosexuals

Rates of suicide (attempted):
18% male homosexuals, 3% male heterosexuals
23% female homosexuals, 11% female heterosexuals

Thomas E. Schmidt, Straight & Narrow? Compassion and Clarity in the Homosexual Debate, 114-115

· An epidemic of STDs

It appears … that at least 75 percent of homosexual are currently carrying one or more pathogens, but these men are not necessarily feeling sick or infecting others. It appears that at least 75 percent also have a history of at least one sexually transmitted disease, but these men are not necessarily very sick or currently sick. It appears that at least 40 percent get sick within a given year, but again they are not they are not necessarily very sick. On the other hand, to estimate the number who are sick at any one time is to underestimate the general danger of serious illnesses for any individual homosexual, a danger that is constant and cumulative."

Thomas E. Schmidt, Straight & Narrow? Compassion and Clarity in the Homosexual Debate, 118

A 1994 study revealed 70% of AIDS deaths were homosexual men.

Suppose you were to move into a large house in San Francisco with a group of ten randomly selected homosexual men in their mid-thirties. According to the most recent research from scientific sources, whose authors are without exception either neutral or positive in their assessment of homosexual behavior, and with the use of lower numbers where statistics differ, the relational and physical health of the group would look like this.
Four of the ten men are currently in relationships, but only one of those is faithful to his partner, and he will not be within a year. Four have never had a relationship that lasted more than a year, and only one has had a relationship that lasted more than three years. Six are having sex regularly with strangers, and the group averages almost two partners per person per month. Three of them occasionally take part in orgies. One is a sadomasochist. One prefers boys to men.
Three of the men are currently alcoholics, five have a history of alcohol abuse, and four have a history of drug abuse. Three currently smoke cigarettes, five regularly use at least one illegal drug, and three are multiple drug users. Four have a history of acute depression, three have seriously contemplated suicide, and two have attempted suicide. Eight have a history of sexually transmitted diseases, eight are currently carrying infectious pathogens, and three currently suffer from digestive or urinary ailments caused by these pathogens. At least three are HIV-infected, and one has AIDS.

Thomas E. Schmidt, Straight & Narrow? Compassion and Clarity in the Homosexual Debate, 127

So you see, God has reasons for his loving limits on sexuality.

Where Do We Go From Here?

1. Transformation is possible.

Transformation is what God is all about. Life change is the reason Jesus came to this sin-infected world. All who would put their complete trust in him experience transformation.

Therefore, if any one is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has passed away, behold, the new has come. 2 Corinthians 5:17

The first line of hope for the homosexual is that those of us who’ve crossed the line of faith will take the life-changing message of Jesus Christ to them. The same God who set you free from bondage to sin and death can set the gay man or woman free.
I also realize that it’s not as easy as that. Not everyone who says "yes" to Christ experiences immediate transformation. Years of ingrained habit requires God’s power and hard work to overcome. Even as believers the Bible encourages us in this way.

Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will know what God wants you to do, and you will know how good and pleasing and perfect his will really is. Romans 12:2 (NLT)

Transformation is possible for the homosexual, just like all of us, but they have to want it and commit to the hard work of change.

NEW ORLEANS (BP)--An explosive new study says some gay people can turn straight if they really want to. Robert L. Spitzer, a psychiatry professor at Columbia University who led the study, said he couldn’t estimate what percentage of highly motivated gay people can change their sexual orientation But he said the research "shows some people can change from gay to straight, and we ought to acknowledge that."
Spitzer spearheaded the APA’s 1973 decision to remove homosexuality from its list of mental disorders. At the time, he said homosexuality does not meet the criteria for a mental disorder, and he called for more research to determine whether some people can change their sexuality.
Spitzer, who said he does not offer reparative therapy and began his study as a skeptic, said the research was paid for out of his department’s funds. He conducted 45-minute telephone interviews with 200 people, 143 of them men, who claimed they had changed their orientation from gay to heterosexual. The average age of those interviewed was 43. They answered about 60 questions about their sexual feelings and behavior before and after their efforts to change. Those efforts had begun about 14 years before the interviews for the men and 12 years for the women Most said they had used more than one strategy to change their orientation About half said the most helpful step was work with a mental health professional, most commonly a psychologist. About a third cited a support group, and fewer mentioned such aids as books and mentoring by a heterosexual.
Spitzer concluded that 66 percent of the men and 44 percent of the women had arrived at what he called good heterosexual functioning. That term was defined as being in a sustained, loving heterosexual relationship within the past year, getting enough satisfaction from the emotional relationship with their partner to rate at least seven on a 10-point scale, having satisfying heterosexual sex at least monthly and never or rarely thinking of somebody of the same sex during heterosexual sex. In addition, 89 percent of men and 95 percent of women said they were bothered only slightly, or not at all, by unwanted homosexual feelings. Only 11 percent of the men and 37 percent of the women reported a complete absence of homosexual indicators, including same-sex attraction.

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There are organizations out there with the express purpose of helping gays who want to change: Spring Forth Ministries in Cincinnati; Desert Stream Ministries in Los Angeles; Exodus International; and Transforming Congregations of the United Methodist Church. Success rates are about the same as those struggling with chemical dependency. You’ve got to want it.

2. Abstinence is the only option outside of monogamous, heterosexual marriage.

This probably sounds horrible to some of you. The reason is that we’ve come to believe that the pursuit of happiness is a God-given right, when really the only place you’ll find it is the Declaration of Independence. God never promises to make us happy in this life. He does promise to make us holy.

We’re so inundated with sex in our culture that we’ve come to believe that a normal human being couldn’t possibly be happy without it. We must get past the notion that sex is the only way to be truly fulfilled. I remember my teen years when the hormones were raging. Sex was not a part of my life, but I was pretty happy. Yes, I had to take a lot of cold showers, but you can be abstinent and fulfilled all at the same time.

Besides, God calls all people to this standard. Anyone not in a monogamous, heterosexual marriage is called by God to abstinence not matter what their sexual orientation.

Finally, a word to any of you believers who have hang-ups with homosexuals.

3. Advice for the Christian: Accept the person, but do not affirm the practice.

Never are we as believers to reject or discriminate against or practice name calling toward gay individuals. Hostility toward them means something is wrong with your heart. God’s command to you is to go after that person created in his image no matter what their practice.

When I wrote to you before, I told you not to associate with people who indulge in sexual sin. But I wasn’t talking about unbelievers who indulge in sexual sin … You would have to leave this world to avoid people like that. What I meant was that you are not to associate with anyone who claims to be a Christian yet indulges in sexual sin … 1 Corinthians 5:9-11 (NLT)

On the other hand, neither are we to sit silently by. You are not loving the person by condoning the practice. Speak the truth in love. Offer the forgiveness, the transformation and the freedom that come only through Jesus Christ.